What is Compassion Fatigue?

Compassion fatigue is like emotional exhaustion that happens when you care deeply for others, especially in stressful or demanding situations. It’s common among people who are constantly helping others, like nurses, social workers, or even caregivers at home. Over time, all that caring can wear you down, leaving you feeling numb, detached, or even hopeless.

How Compassion Fatigue Manifests, Especially in Black Women:

For Black women in their 30s and older, compassion fatigue can look different depending on their life circumstances. Whether they’re juggling careers, family responsibilities, or community work, the constant pressure to be strong and supportive can be overwhelming. It’s often said that older Black women are mean, they don’t reach back to help the younger generation, and it feels like they have collectively agreed to gatekeep the wisdom we need to be as resilient as they were. Have you ever stopped to consider why that might be the case for some older Black women?

1. Professional Women:

   • Black women in corporate or professional settings often face a “double burden.” They’re expected to excel in their careers while also dealing with microaggressions, racism, and sexism. Over time, the emotional toll of having to “prove” themselves and support their colleagues and communities can lead to compassion fatigue. It may show up as burnout, cynicism, or just feeling drained all the time.

2. Stay-at-Home Moms and Caregivers:

   • Black women who are primary caregivers at home may experience compassion fatigue from the constant demands of caring for children, elderly relatives, or even friends. The emotional labor involved, combined with societal expectations to be the “strong, selfless” caretaker, can lead to feelings of resentment, anxiety, and a deep sense of exhaustion.

3. Single Creatives and Entrepreneurs:

   • Those pursuing creative careers or entrepreneurship often pour their hearts into their work, sometimes at the cost of their own well-being. Compassion fatigue can manifest as creative burnout, where the passion for their work dwindles, leaving them feeling disconnected and unmotivated.

4. Depressed Baddies and Anxious Eldest Daughters:

   • Many Black women, especially those who have been the “eldest daughter” or a leader in their families, are expected to be the emotional backbone. This can lead to compassion fatigue as they’re constantly looking after everyone else’s needs while neglecting their own. The mental load can manifest as anxiety, depression, or a sense of isolation.

The Emotional, Mental, and Physical Toll:

• Emotional Toll: Constantly giving to others without replenishing your own emotional reserves can lead to feelings of sadness, irritability, and detachment. Black women may feel like they’re losing themselves in the process of caring for everyone else.

• Mental Toll: Compassion fatigue can cause concentration issues, memory problems, and difficulty making decisions. The constant stress may also trigger anxiety or depression, making it hard to maintain mental well-being. Every woman has been through the vicious cycle of feeling like your best just isn’t enough.

• Physical Toll: The stress of compassion fatigue can lead to physical symptoms like headaches, fatigue, insomnia, and even chronic illnesses. The body often reflects the emotional and mental strain through these physical ailments. Capitalism forces you to disconnect from your body to earn enough money for survival, and then punishes you for being sick.

Historical Coping and Generational Trauma:

Historically, Black women have coped with these pressures by adopting the role of the “strong Black woman,” a stereotype that implies they can handle anything without showing vulnerability. While this has been a survival mechanism in the face of systemic racism and sexism, it has also contributed to generational trauma.

• Generational Trauma: The expectation to be strong and self-sacrificing has been passed down through generations, leading many Black women to suppress their emotions and needs. This unresolved trauma can manifest in future generations as anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues.

• Coping Mechanisms: Historically, Black women have turned to faith, community, and activism as ways to cope with these pressures. However, without proper mental health support, these coping mechanisms can sometimes lead to burnout.

This old paradigm will no longer work. According to astrology, Earth is shifting into a new era where community is the key to survival, but not in the ways we have come to know it. Revolution begins in the body (Dayna Lynn Nuckolls) so each of you will need to do your soul work to see how you can contribute to the community you wish to be a part of.

What We Are Dealing With:

Today, Black women 30+ are dealing with the compounded effects of compassion fatigue, generational trauma, and the pressures of modern life. The need to succeed in their careers, support their families, and maintain their well-being can be overwhelming. The burden of being seen as “strong” can prevent them from seeking the help they need, leading to further emotional and physical health issues.

How to Fix It:

1. Acknowledging the Problem: The first step is recognizing that compassion fatigue is real and that it’s okay to not be okay. Black women need to give themselves permission to feel and express their emotions.

2. Seeking Support: Therapy, support groups, and mental health resources tailored to Black women can provide the space needed to heal. Organizations like the Black Emotional and Mental Health Collective (BEAM) offer resources specifically for Black mental health.

3. Setting Boundaries: Learning to say no and setting boundaries is crucial. This means prioritizing self-care and recognizing when you’re overextending yourself.

4. Practicing Self-Care: Regular self-care practices, such as mindfulness, exercise, and hobbies, can help replenish emotional reserves. Rest is also essential—taking time to rest without guilt is a form of resistance against the expectation to be constantly strong.

5. Breaking the Cycle of Generational Trauma: Educating younger generations about the importance of mental health and emotional expression can help break the cycle of generational trauma. Encouraging open conversations about feelings and mental health can create a more supportive environment.

Relevant Sources:

• American Psychological Association (APA): Articles on compassion fatigue and its impact on mental health.

• Black Emotional and Mental Health Collective (BEAM): Resources on mental health, especially for Black communities.

• "Too Heavy a Yoke: Black Women and the Burden of Strength" by Chanequa Walker-Barnes, Ph.D.: Explores the strong Black woman trope and its impact on mental health.

• "The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma" by Bessel van der Kolk, M.D.: Discusses how trauma, including generational trauma, affects the body and mind.

• National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH): Provides research and resources on the mental health impacts of compassion fatigue and burnout.

• Dayna Lynn Nuckolls: The People’s Oracle teaches Divination for Liberation through educating the masses on sidereal astrology.

• iJaadee: Astrologer to the stars sharing free resources on human design, ai, astrology, and more.